Serious Humour north of 54 degrees latitude: Dan Eggs


“Spin Dryer and Washing Machine”



The spin dryer’s moved in with the washing machine,

they’re living together, you know what I mean, I believe the spin dryer’s

the clothes bin’s mum, he came out of her rotating aerated drum,

she takes the day off when the weather’s fine, then he does a line

with the clothes line, they live in an outhouse without any fuss, are

these household appliances quite like us?  (The washing machine once

spilt his load because he was in fast coloureds mode).




“Sunday Morning”



The cow in the field chews the grass, she never thinks about going to

Mass, the little bird sitting high on the birch, he and his friends don’t

think about church, the wasps in the dustbin devouring the apple, what

do they know about going to chapel, the elderly lady sits in her pew,

while her young son watches Kung Fu.



Dan Eggs’ poems first appeared in the

2006 anthology, “Magnetic North” (edited by John Brown).

There are reprinted here by permission of

The Lagan Press, Belfast, Northern Ireland.